Archive for the ‘Guest Writer’ Category
18 May 2012
Ideas to Help the Bright ADHD Child Succeed Socially
Posted by DAVID BC TAN under: Guest Writer; LD.
GUEST WRITER: Dr. Steven Richfield
soprislearning.wordpress.com
Bright children with ADHD may succeed in the academic world but have trouble socially. Knowing the right answers, even when attention drifts in and out of focus, is not as challenging as figuring out how to appropriately direct their behavior in the presence of others.
As ADHD compels children to seek social stimulation—be it from peers, siblings, or adults—they may appear needy and annoying, and embarrass themselves and family members in the process. Doors of social opportunity close, and friendships erode; emotional pain and social exclusion result. Parents and teachers watch helplessly as the book-smart ADHD child unwittingly sabotages his or her social standing.
If this circumstance resonates with the dramas and dilemmas facing a child you know, read on for coaching tips.
Build a dialogue that blends sensitivity to their circumstances and confidence that they can improve their people skills. Observe how aware these children are of the disapproving signals sent from others when their social approach oversteps boundaries. List the ways they may overstep: talking too much, voice volume too loud, interrupting conversations, imposing self-serving topics, ignoring obvious cues to show interest in and listen to others, physical restlessness and verbal impatience with delays, etc. Reassure them that these social errors can be corrected, just as they can correct problems on assignments and tests in school.
Most ADHD children know their diagnosis but do not comprehend the social struggles related to their condition. Educating a child about this issue does not offer an excuse to escape from responsibility. In contrast, it reinforces the vital importance of learning social intelligence to ensure that ADHD does not inhibit their climb to happiness and success in life. Explain how the task of managing feeling states (frustration, eagerness, happiness, impatience, boredom, excitement, etc.) affects all kids and teens, but that ADHD makes it harder due to the trouble with impulse control. Liken impulsivity to fuel that pushes feelings into verbal and physical behaviors.
Emphasize that the first step to being more “socially smart” is building a pause button in their thinking when they feel the early signs of impulsivity starting to push them into behaviors. Help them identify these physical precursors to impulse discharge, such as finger tapping, hand drumming, fidgetiness, bodily warmth, chest heaviness, queasiness, or some other warning sign. Gently tell them what you have noticed about their impulsivity issues and offer observations from other teachers, coaches, instructors, or caretakers.
Develop a simple and practical plan for them to have at their disposal when social events threaten to trigger the costs of impulsivity. Delineate the various social groupings they come across, such as peer group, peer one-on-one, adult one-on-one, adult with peer group, family, extended family, etc. List the behaviors that others expect from them based on the implicit rules of these groupings (i.e., greater or lesser talking, elaborate answers, listening with interest, relevant questioning, etc.). Review their success after encounters and brainstorm ways to further improve.
Published with permission
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Dr. Steven Richfield is a child psychologist in Plymouth Meeting, PA. He has developed a child-friendly self-control/social skills building program called Parent Coaching Cards. It is available at www.parentcoachcards.com His new book, The Parent Coach: A New Approach To Parenting In Today’s Society is available through Sopris. It offers strategies to educators looking for practical, hands-on tools to help all children self-monitor and self-manage their behavior. Sopris offers a range of educational materials for children’s reading curriculum & writing curriculum.
9 May 2012
Teaching kids how to make informed choices
Posted by DAVID BC TAN under: Guest Writer; Parenting; Socialization.
GUEST WRITER: Martha NLand
poundthegarlic.blogspot.com
RECENTLY IT DAWNED UPON ME that perhaps I should add a new aspect to my children’s education, which is the aspect of Emotional Intelligence. As parents we often have to deal with matters such as sibling squabbles, peer influences (bad and good ones), stuff that happens outside of home with friends/teachers/others, bad/good choices that were made by our children, often times when we were not able to be there to help them think/decide.
So while browsing through the library, I came across this book, “Teaching Emotional Intelligence: Making Informed Choices” by Adina Bloom Lewkowicz. I think it’s a pretty good book, that’s divided into 3 sections: Feeling Positive, Thinking Wisely and Acting Sensibly. Topics covered include Self Awareness, Managing Emotions, Choice Making, Self Acceptance, Perfectionism, Friendship, Strengthening Family, Peer Pressure, Put downs, Manipulation, Listening, Assertiveness, Cheating, Abuse and so on.
What I like about this book is that lessons provided are broken down into various activities such as discussion, stories, brainstorming, drama, role play and observation.
So today, we started with Chapter One, about making choices.
Then following an activity suggestion from the book, Nel and Jo took turns walking around the room while the other observed. After the walk, we discussed the choices made while walking around the room. Did they make deliberate choices, or simply walked automatically and then sat down?
After a discussion about how we can think about our choices, the girls walked a second time. The second time, both girls walked with consciously made choices about speed, posture, direction to take when walking, what to do with objects in the way etc. This was quite humorous as they made quite a drama out of it!!
Our discussion went like this:
ME: Suppose a friend visits and says “Let’s play together, but let’s lock your sister out of the room and not include her.” What would you do? Let’s talk first about how you would feel.
MY CHILDREN:
A) I’d feel that I really didn’t want to play with my sister. I might dislike her then if she’s been irritating.
B) I’d feel like I needed time alone with my friend, without my sister.
C) I’d want to play with my sister too.
D) I’d like to play with my sister and friend, but don’t know which to choose. Maybe play with my sister later.
ME: Ok, those are true feelings that we feel, and it’s ok to feel that way. Now let’s discuss how we could think these feelings through.
MY CHILDREN:
A) I’d think about playing with my friend first and my sister later.
B) I could think to include my sister even if I don’t feel like it.
C) I like my friend’s idea of leaving my sister out, but I shouldn’t hurt my sister.
D) Find a solution like find my sister another friend so she’ll be happy, then I can go play with mine.
ME: Ok, now that you’ve thought about it, here comes the important part. How would you act?
MY CHILDREN:
A) Invite another friend over, wait, then let my sister play with her friend, then go play with mine.
B) Sit my friend and sister down, and read them both a story and play together.
C) Encourage my friend to play with my sister.
D) Talk to my sister and explain that I need 10 minutes with my friend first, and promise to play with my sister later.
ME: Ok, good. So we’ve learnt that despite how we feel about a decision, we should first think deliberately before making a decision. Then act on the thought-out decision. We should always make deliberate choices instead of just acting on our feelings. About the above, if we didn’t think, we could have slammed the door on our sister and hurt her badly in reality.
Then a discussion ensued between Jo and Nel about how they’d been hurt by this situation before and we liked solution D.
I think this lesson was so needed and effective (at least for today it was.) I’m sure they will need many more reminders before they consciously put this into practice, but it is a start. 
In fact, I realise I need to put this into practice too!
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About the author:
Martha is homeschooling mom to two lovely daughters. She is also a volunteer at Start Society, an academy that employs the arts to serve underprivileged children in the community. Martha also blogs at flourpaint.blogspot.com
16 April 2012
Aesop’s Fables, Molecules and Physics
Posted by DAVID BC TAN under: Curriculum; Guest Writer; Preschool.
Guest Writer: Amy Delph
edisonmom.blogspot.com
Education is not about compartmentalising curricula and subjects as if they were independent of each other. The good thing about homeschooling is the freedom to break down the walls of compartmentalization and integrate learning across curricula. Amy Delph shares how a simple reading and comprehension session with her preschoolers became a lesson about physics and chemistry.
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TODAY I THOUGHT WE DO SOME WORK on comprehension and critical discussion of a reading passage with Katelynn. I chose an Aesop fable, “The Crow and the Pitcher”, from Teaching with Aesop’s Fables. It started out innocently enough. I had Katelynn read the fable by herself, but what happened next blew me away.
In the fable the crow is unable to get a drink on a hot day from a pitcher, so he adds stones one by one until the water level rises enough for him drink. We started out talking about the moral, but the discussion quickly moved on to how the crow could get the water to rise.
Read on »
13 January 2011
Don’ts in Teaching
Posted by DAVID BC TAN under: Guest Writer.
Guest Blogger: Steven David Horwich
www.connectthethoughts.net
Homeschooling is a profound challenge for a parent. Sure, it’s a challenge for the student, too. But the parent has to suddenly become an expert teacher. And since it’s your children that you’re teaching, you want to be a great teacher!
Here are some don’ts to consider as you start (continue) your teaching adventure:
- Don’t restrict the student to the “three R’s”.
Listen, and when the student expresses an interest in a subject (other than video games), do what you can to expose them to subjects they’re reaching for. You may go through several of these and find your student rejecting them before hitting on one or two they love. Expect to waste some money and time. But those interests which they embrace will help shape the rest of the student’s life, provide them joy and possible security. This is a real advantage homeschool families have that schools generally cannot provide; flexibility in subject matter which can be tailored to the student’s interests. Interested students work harder at their studies than uninterested students.
- Don’t micromanage any more than is necessary.
The more responsibility the student takes, the more they’ll learn. We expect a lot from our children, but we rarely grant them authority equal to the level of responsibility. You probably don’t like it much when you’re told to do a thing but not given the freedom to do it your way. Your student doesn’t like it, either. A gradual, careful surrendering to a student of authority over their education empowers and prepares them for life. We call people who are entirely responsible for themselves “adults”. (At least, that’s the idea.) That should be where your student is headed.
- Don’t edit or “critique” your student’s creative efforts.
Creativity is a deeply personal thing. A creative work is nothing less than a part of the person who created it, shared with the world. Accordingly, few qualities are as fragile as creativity. A disapproving look at the wrong time can slow creativity down. Correcting spelling in a creative writing exercise, when creative expression and not spelling was the point, can blunt the student’s interest. And “helping” with ideas, plots, melodies, whatever, only tells the student that their own ideas aren’t enough, or good enough. Left alone with plenty of opportunity to experiment, almost anyone could become an artist of some sort. In the arts, study and experience (exposure and practice) generate expertise far more than critique ever did. Willing artists create far more than those who are brow-beaten and who have been “trained” to doubt their own insights and skills.
The Dos? Do listen, answer questions, provide resources and opportunities, and admire your students and their creations.
These don’ts and dos can go a long way toward making you an excellent teacher, to your student’s lifelong advantage.
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ABOUT THE WRITER: Steven David Horwich has been both a professional writer and a professional educator his entire adult life. He started authoring a curricula that would become Connect The Thoughts when he withdrew his children from private school in September, 2002. Incidentally, Steven’s daughter, Katherine, came up with the name Connect The Thoughts, and his son, William, was the first to complete the entire Upper School program. He worked exclusively authoring CTT from 2002 to 2010.
18 June 2010
A global adventure
Posted by DAVID BC TAN under: Guest Writer.
[Here's a great idea for geography lessons: Homeschooling mom Heather who blogs at Cultivated Lives takes her boys on a fun adventure around the world. It's so cool you might just be inspired to take your own kids on a similar trip.]
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Going Global
We plan on traveling all over the world this summer…
…without ever leaving home.
That’s right, this summer we embark on a journey around the world and discover where we fit into it!
Xander already has my love of maps. Sometimes I wonder if it can be genetic. Afterall, I am the daughter of a cartographer dad and a geography-degreed mom!
This last year we’ve had fun running to our wall map of the world to find locations that come up in our reading. After reading a book about the earth, the boys set to work creating their own maps!
I was actually pretty amazed at the features and locations that Xander included on his map. He totally pegged where we live in his rendition of North America and was able to pinpoint where Ittiel lives (the Peruvian boy we sponsor through Compassion.)
Keegan drew a fanciful map of his ‘world’ which included mostly local places (our house, the store, the cookie store, Oma/Opa’s house, Aunt B’s, etc…)
[You can see more photos and read the rest of the kids' global adventure at Cultivated Lives].
Thanks Heather, for letting me put your post here!
23 December 2009
Throw Out Your Perfect Standards
Posted by DAVID BC TAN under: Guest Writer; Social awareness.
This is an excerpt from a speech given by Amy J. Delph at the 2008 EDISON Youth Achievement Awards Ceremony. Public service is a component of the award and here Amy is speaking about the need to do longer term public service projects and the benefits such projects have. Amy is the director of EDISON Enterprises, a company that specializes in programs that promote critical and creative thinking. Several homeschoolers have had stints with EDISON as well. You can find out more about these programs by calling her at 012-658-7587 or visiting the website.
A COUPLE OF MONTHS AGO I READ a disturbing report about events in Haiti. The report began with this line, “It was lunchtime in one of Haiti’s worst slums, and Charlene Dumas was eating mud. Charlene, 16 with a month-old son, has come to rely on a traditional Haitian remedy for hunger pangs: cookies made of dried yellow dirt from the country’s central plateau. ”
I read further to discover that the price of food had gone up by 40%, not just in Haiti, but in many Caribbean island nations. People like Charlene make up 80% of the population of Haiti and they get by on less than $2 U.S. dollars a day. Two cups of rice (back then in January) cost .60 cents. When they cannot afford the food the poor turn to eating dirt cookies.
Food shortages and hunger are just one issue. We’ve all seen how high oil prices can reduce opportunities for education, health care and other needs for people. We also have natural disasters like cyclone Nargis and the earthquake in China. While we will always have natural disasters, poverty, environmental pollution, and other problems, the severity and frequency with which we are seeing these events take place sends a strong signal that we can no longer sit on the side lines and let others take care of the problems.
We don’t even have to go across the ocean to see the urgent calls for public service. We find them right here in our back yard. And by that I mean the extraordinary change in the political landscape of Malaysia. The results of the March 8th elections have shaken things up considerably and open opportunities for more voices to be heard and more avenues to take action. Furthermore, I believe the results have underscored an important principle of democracy and that is citizen involvement. That doesn’t mean only in political ways. Involvement in democracy includes concern for the sustainable well being of fellow human beings as well as of the environment in which we live. It includes awareness of and concern for human rights and a willingness to consider the views of others.
I believe we are in a unique time period. If we fail to promote a culture of civic involvement among both adults and our youth, then the new democratic space will close. Either the old powers will reassert themselves or new powers will gain control. We must remember that democracy requires us to be active stakeholders. We must not lose sight of the original roots of the Greek notion of government and democracy, which is citizens working together to determine the character and direction of their society. Aristotle, an ancient Greek philosopher wrote, “All persons alike should share in the government to the upmost.
And so I have identified 3 important reasons why we should focus on voluntary public service:
The first deals with effectiveness of longer community service projects. The other two touch on the urgent signs that tell us that we dare not neglect community involvement.
But that is probably not enough to motivate you. Many of us are already aware of these issues, but we still resist active involvement. I think American writer and political activist Paul Loeb summed this resistance perfectly when called it the “perfect standard.” The perfect standard includes: The perfect time, the perfect cause and the perfect activist.
The Perfect Time
With the “perfect time” people believe they shouldn’t begin working for social change until the time is ideal. When the children are grown, when it’s not an exam year, after I finish my studies, etc. But we must realize that there probably is never going to be a time in our lives when we are not facing some kind demand or pressure. Paul Loeb says, “Instead each of us faces a lifelong series of imperfect moments in which we must decide what to stand for.” While we wait for the ideal time to arrive, weeks, months and years pass by. Our whole lives can go by before we fine the “perfect” time to get involved.
The Perfect Cause
With this one we want something that is easy to do and we will see results quickly and there is a perfect plan of action. In other words there is no uncertainty and the cause is already a winner. It has to be in the right location and must fit our schedules perfectly. As we wait for the perfect cause we squander repeated opportunities to involve ourselves in the larger community for causes whose reasons may be imperfect and whose outcome is far from certain – in other words, causes that are real.
The Perfect Activist
For this barrier, people of all ages feel they have to have all the knowledge and all the abilities required before they can get involved. They feel they have to have absolute understanding of the situation before wading in. That may be true of the fireman who walks into the burning building, but it is not the case for lending a helping hand in your community.
We don’t need absolute knowledge to get involved; we only need to have a sincere desire to make a difference. That desire is the starting point that puts us on the road to learn. We learn as we go, we learn from mistakes, we learn from our experiences and we learn from trial and error.
Take Tara Suri. When she was 12, she accompanied her parents on a visit to their homeland of India. While she was there, she was touched by the extreme poverty she witnessed all around her. When she returned back to the States, she decided to do something about it. Tara decided to raise money for orphanages in India and the Sudan. Did she know a lot about these orphanages or special techniques for raising funds? Did she have a lot of contacts that she could mobilize to raise millions of dollars? No. Tara started with what skills and knowledge she had. Her first effort was a bake sales and recycling used soda cans. Then she got her friends involved and started a club called HOPE. Step by step she and her friends worked on this problem. She has since joined forces with another NGO to form a website called Turn your World Around were she offers encouragement and practical help to young people who want to get active in making a change in their world.
The problem with our notion of the perfect activist is that we don’t think of people like Tara Suri. We look at people like Martin Luther King Jr. at the height of his influence and we think we need to be like that. But we have to remember that even Martin Luther King didn’t know everything about civil rights leadership before he started and he made mistakes and had failures too.
We do not make things worse by getting involved; getting involved helps things get better. In fact “knowing nothing” makes us easier to be around and easier to work with. We have no ego to get in the way! We should be like Tara Suri and take action despite our fears and less-than-perfect preparation.
How do we characterize a socially active person? Another wonderful quote from Paul Loeb says, “We are people of imperfect character, acting on the basis of imperfect knowledge, for causes that may be imperfect as well.” It seems to me that Mr. Loeb’s standard is one we can all live up to.
So we come back again to the question of, “What’s next?” Although as the leader of Edison Youth Achievement Award, I have answered that question, it reminds me of a saying about leadership. “If you think you’re a leading and you look back and no one is following, then you’re just taking a walk.”
The question has to be answered by each of you. If we are able to lay down our perfect standard, we can become an advisor for EYAA, opening an opportunity for five more youths to have the chance to grow in ways they never expect, just like you heard in today’s speeches. If we lay down our perfect standards, people like Charlene Duma don’t have to go hungry. And if we lay down our perfect standards we can shape this nation’s future rather than leaving it to rot in cynicism and indifference. How will you answer this question today?
24 June 2009
What were we thinking?
Posted by DAVID BC TAN under: Guest Writer.
GUEST WRITER: Bill Smith
The other day I was rifling through some old computer disks in search of one I could copy some files to. To my amazement, some of the disks still worked. More amazing was one Microsoft Word version 5 file I found from 1993, our first full year of “official” homeschooling. The file was named simply “WHY.doc.”
I opened this little mystery nugget to find the brave declaration by parents of a six-year-old, parents who dared against cultural tide and conventional reason to homeschool. We lived at the time in a different country, far from support groups and curriculum fairs and far from American homeschool pioneers who could assure us we weren’t crazy.
Here, we took our stand, though the neighbors thought us alien in more than nationality. Here we did what no one trying to fit into a foreign culture should do—homeschool. There were so many doubts and so many sleep-delayed nights pondering what could be wrong with us that we would risk ostracism and damage to our six-year-old and her little sister. Each morning, mothers waved their children down our little street of tightly-packed houses toward the government school. Only our school-age child remained at home. What was wrong with us? What were we thinking?
And yet, the desire to educate our children at home would not hold back. Inside, we knew we were committed. Outside, we doubted and even grieved for the relationships strained by our decision. It was then that we realized we could not maintain this stand against the “natural order” of modern society unless we agreed on a “declaration.” Like Luther at Wittenberg, the colonial signers at Philadelphia, and lesser-knowns whose words have been lost, my wife and I made a list titled “Why We Desire Home Education.” I can tell you now that there were at least five and a half reasons. (Either that was enough or later editions of Word don’t read well the old version 5 files.)
In 1993, we nailed that list to the door of our minds to fend off doubts and doubters. We placed our John Hancocks under the fifth-and-a-half point to remind ourselves that even if no one else agreed with us, at least we agreed with each other. We also agreed that this was God’s direction for our home.
We have entertained few doubts since 1993. Making that list and agreeing on our course together set a foundation that we could point back to and remind ourselves that, even if what we do sometimes seems wrong, we do it in full agreement. Even if we and our children endure difficulty because of it, we know that we began this homeschooling voyage in faith that it is right for our family.
The decision to homeschool is still not easy for many. To sustain that decision through internal doubts and external opposition, making a list, agreeing together and posting it on the mind’s door is a great beginning toward staying the course.
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ABOUT THE WRITER: Bill Smith is father to two home educated girls and husband to one extraordinary homeschool mom. Bill and Derri Smith authored The Character Series for home education, and they provide values-based book reviews at BookAngles. Their current work is to prevent human trafficking. The above article first appeared at HomeschoolEnrichment.com
14 May 2009
Walking in the Light
Posted by DAVID BC TAN under: Devotional; Guest Writer.
GUEST WRITER: Selina Lim
God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. (1 John 1: 5, NIV)
The atmosphere was somewhat romantic with candlelight. Ah hah…not fine dining with my beloved husband. That would be a luxury.
It was the last Saturday of March. We were doing our part as good citizens of this beautiful world.My daughter and my sister made their statement to fight global warming by casting their votes for Earth Hour, a global event organized by WWF (World Wide Fund for Nature or World Wildlife Fund) annually. We were gearing up for that hour by ensuring dinner and dishes and showers were done by 8.30pm. Excitement filled the air as the children talked about what they would like to do during that hour. What an opportunity to bring out our beautiful scented candles and let them shine! The simple dwelling became exotic just with candlelight.
What an adjustment even for just an hour! Every time I entered a room, my hand automatically reached out for the switch on the wall, only to remember I was observing Earth Hour just before my finger made a quick tap. Baby Ashton was busy as usual crawling and exploring the house. The darkness did not deter his exploration. My eyes had to be keener in following his active movement, ensuring his safety. Then I smelled a stinky diaper. As much as I was tempted to switch on the light so that I can do a good job in washing his bottom, I wanted to follow through our vote without “cheating”. One of my little helper had to shine the candlelight while I washed him. The shadows cast upon the toilet wall entertained this super wriggly baby. Extra checks were done to ensure he was thoroughly cleansed. It was such hoo-ha over this daily norm.
I was really thankful for proper lighting. I am even more thankful for the Light of God and living in the Light. In fact, the verse says God IS Light. Darkness has a representation of hostility and aimlessness in life. It exudes a creepy and evil feel. It speaks of the enemy. The interesting point is, when light comes, darkness has to flee immediately. Light, no matter how small instantly overcomes darkness. It never fails to give direction even if it may be just one step at a time. It orders our steps. The power of light erases the works of darkness (Romans 13:12). There is absolutely no room for darkness when light enters.
Walking in the Light gives us confidence and peace simply because we can see, and knowing that our steps are sure and the destiny in God is certain. Harm and dangers may seek to threaten us but surely cannot touch us. We are protected (Psalms 34:7). What a comfort to know that even in the valley of the shadows of death God is with us (Psalm 23:4).
Having lived in the light, any form of darkness will surely cause us to be uncomfortable. The brief one hour without light for me affected my activities. How much more negative impact it would be for our lives if we do not have the Light of God? Or should I say, “if we do not have God?”
Give thanks for his deliverance and let’s remember the lost.
God of Light, Thank You for delivering me out of darkness into Your Light. It is so good to know we can walk confidently and peacefully in our daily lives and towards our eternal destiny. I ask that You will be gracious and merciful to many who need Your Light. Shine, Jesus shine! Fill the land with Your Glory. In Jesus’ name. Amen.
About the writer: Selina Lim is a homeschooling mother of four. Selina and her family lives in sunny Penang. This post originally appeared in her devotional blog, Gems For The Heart
26 October 2002
A New Life
Posted by DAVID BC TAN under: Guest Writer; Parenting.
GUEST WRITER: Celine Leslie
With the arrival of our newborn baby boy Jonty (“God has given”), our family has embarked on a new adventure in the unpredictable and exciting journey of life. For me, being able to hold the evidence of new life has been a vital part of leaving the past behind and forging ahead with investing in the future of another soul that needs nurturing. While Kyle (in heaven for almost 2 years now) will always be lovingly remembered in our family, the fact that our destinies have taken separate paths does not hurt quite so badly now.
What happens to homeschooling when a baby arrives? Those with babies will testify to the planning that mothers go through while still pregnant, wondering what the best course of action is. Having had babies before assures me that it is possible to homeschool with a baby. Nevertheless the temptation is to worry and fret over the other children missing out on education while mother is too exhausted from lack of sleep or looking after a colicky baby.
The truth is that the children have had a wonderful time bonding with their new sibling. Meanwhile, Dad has been home most of the time, having a ball playing backyard cricket or taking them on outings. Being school holidays, the children have also been taking advantage of free activities on offer at this time. Most of all, they have had the invaluable and precious experience of caring for a newborn baby and making sacrifices to help mum with household duties. Formal bookwork takes a backseat when these life lessons (which don’t come by very often) are being learnt. Children do not always remember what they are taught. However, certain experiences leave indelible marks upon their minds. When the children look back at their childhood, they will remember these times with fondness.
Without the convenience of having relatives close by, a few worries did cross our minds. God, however, had already had His plan in mind. Labour started only when all commitments had ended and the calendar was empty. The delivery happened during the day, ensuring that the children only had to be at friends’ for a few hours. The hospital staff was kind enough to allow a 4-night stay, allowing for adequate rest and recovery. Since coming home, all my meals have been unexpectedly catered for by wonderful friends. Just when one supply ends, another arrives, and it hasn’t finished yet. The bottom line – God looks after us.
Which should not be a surprise. When I gaze at Jonty, I am amazed at the trust of a baby (Ps 22:9 – You made me trust while on my mother’s breast). The baby does not question the ability of the mother to care for him. Jonty does not worry about the supply of milk. If he did question it, he would find out that God, in His goodness, has made the law of supply and demand such that the supply would always be there as long as Jonty needed it, even for a few years. Yet the evidence of a few years’ supply of milk would be lacking. How often we wish to see the evidence of God’s provision instead of trusting God to supply according to our need. If only we could be unquestioningly contented to suck out of God’s perfect provision, believing that He would be far more able than the world’s most perfect mother to give us the very best care in every part of our lives.
You can see that it has been a time of learning for all of us. There are undoubtedly many more lessons to be learnt as we go through the joys and tribulations of parenting this new life. Meanwhile, we thank God that He is the Author of life and the Maker of all things new.
About the author: Celine Leslie who resides in Adelaide was blessed with the birth of Jonty on 23 Sept 2002. Congratulations to the parents, Mark and Celine!
20 September 2002
Homeschool Liberties
Posted by DAVID BC TAN under: Guest Writer; Reading.
GUEST WRITER: Grace Koh
Tears began to well up in her large, dark eyes. Her mouth, usually formed into a mischievous grin, began to take on an inverted U-shape.Then she began to cry. Loudly.
“Okay, okay. We’ll do something else,” I said wearily. I put away the book and resigned myself to the fact that my fourth attempt had ended in miserable failure – like all the previous attempts. I made a mental note to look for someone to donate the book to.
My daughter is bright, intelligent, inquisitive and one of her favourite words is ‘Why?’. She knew her alphabet and could easily recognise various words she sees around her. But she couldn’t read. Or rather, she wouldn’t.
I was trying to get her started on reading by using the time-tested `Peter and Jane’ series. Clearly it was not working. As newcomers to homeschooling, I cannot even begin to describe how discouraged I was feeling, having to face this setback so early on. I was completely disheartened.
As the days passed, I began to feel better as I observed how happy Beatrix was, busying herself with her usual ‘activities’. I then recalled the moment she had announced her educational preference by telling me emphatically, “Mummy, I don’t want to go to school.”
That was a year ago from then, when she was about two plus and I had been collecting brochures and scouting around for a suitable playschool/kindy. Her clear intention not to attend school hurled me into a world of turmoil and eventually, pushed me into the unchartered territory (or so I thought – then) of homeschooling.
As I began to explore this educational possibility, it seemed to me to be more and more viable in more ways than one. It took me a good six months of (part-time) research and plenty of encouragement from other homeschoolers before we officially decided to go the homeschool way.
Back to the reading bit. Some time after the final abortive attempt at `Peter and Jane,’ we went to our favourite bookstore to browse. My daughter loved to be read to, despite her seemingly reluctant attitude towards reading. She had wanted to look for a new Tigger story. It was then that a range of reading books caught my eye – a series of twenty books with catchy titles, interesting stories and fascinating illustrations. I leafed through Book 1 and showed it to my daughter, tentatively asking, “Would you be interested in this?”
She took the book and flipped over the pages. “Yes!” came the excited reply.
The book was a smash hit! Beatrix enjoyed it tremendously and would even pick it up herself to read after we had gone over it a couple of times. Soon we went on to Book 2, then Book 3, then Book 4.
By relating this story, I am by no means suggesting that everyone should abandon Peter and Jane and turn to the reading series we are using. What I am saying is that there will always be alternatives available if ‘classic’ ones don’t work. And homeschooling gives us, as teachers, fantastic opportunities to choose those best suited for our children.
Alternatives which would otherwise be disallowed or not even considered in conventional schooling. Homeschooling my child has made me realise that, just like adults do not all learn the same thing in the same manner, neither do children. They are, after all, ‘little adults’.
As homeschoolers, we have the blessed luxury and treasured liberty of choice.
My short path so far along the homeschooling road had been rather bumpy. My friends, well-meaning though they may be, never tire of showing me their horrified expressions when they meet me and find out that Beatrix, now five, is still ‘not in school’. They always dutifully point out and warn me of the dire consequences she would face as an adult if she were not exposed to the ‘real world’ via the school system.
As for my relatives (and my husband’s) well, that is another story altogether!
But I have a lot more resolve now than I did a year ago, and anti-homeschool sentiments from friends and families alike are affecting me less and less. Each time I hit a trough, all I have to do is to look at Beatrix and I feel more convinced that we have made the right decision for her wholistic education.
Now, if only I can find a way to effectively teach her to be diligent in clearing her always-overflowing table.
About the writer: Grace Koh’s daughter Beatrix was 5 years old when she contributed this piece in 2002